2017考研趣味阅读：面对熊孩子父母说过的那些逗比谎言

考研吧来源：中国日报 2016-01-18　

Traumatised Reddit users have revealed the little white lies they were told as children - and many believed until adulthood.

网友们在红迪网上晒出了小时候听过的各种善意的谎言，表示“很受伤”——有些人甚至直到成年后才发现那些话是假的。

From being told they're 'allergic to sugar' to threats that the plane will turn around if they misbehave, the lies - often told by parents or by mean elder siblings - left a lasting impression on the Reddit users.

这些谎言大多出自父母或熊哥哥、熊姐姐之口：小到“糖过敏”，大到“如果不听话飞机就会掉头”，给网友们留下了深刻的印象。

Every parent wants the best for their child, but used extreme tactics to encourage a healthy lifestyle.

每位父母都是为了孩子好，但有时为了鼓励孩子培养健康的生活方式，他们会采取一些非常手段。

One Reddit user was told the 'candy next to the checkout line' at the supermarket was not for sale.

有网友说，大人告诉他/她，“超市收银台旁边的糖果不是卖的”。

'My mom told me that rice cakes were cookies,' one person wrote.

另一网友写道：“我妈告诉我米糕就是曲奇。”

'Mine went straight for telling me I was allergic to sugar,' said another.

还有网友表示：“我妈直接告诉我，我对糖过敏。”

Other people were told lies by parents wanting some privacy in the bedroom - and it was not until adulthood that they realised the real reason the door was shut.

还有一些网友的父母为了夫妻隐私对他们撒谎，他们直到成年后才明白父母卧室门紧闭的真正原因。

'The door is locked because mummy was helping daddy hang a picture behind the door and we didn't want you to open it and hit us,' one person wrote.

有网友写道：“他们告诉我，妈妈正在帮爸爸往门后面挂画，不让我开门是怕门会撞到他们。”

But it's not just parents who fuel the rumour mill around the home.

但在家里散播谣言的可不止父母。

'My sister, who is 13 years older than me, was angry when I lost my first tooth and got a dollar, instead of the quarter she received when she lost her first tooth,' one person wrote.

有网友写道：“我姐比我大十三岁。我第一次换牙时得了一美元，而她掉第一颗牙时只得了25美分，所以她很生气。”

'As I danced around in my pajamas holding my crisp new dollar bill, my sister poked her head out of room and said, "Man, a dollar? Just wait until the leg fairy comes, you'll get, like, twenty dollars".

“我穿着睡衣，拿着那张崭新的一美元手舞足蹈。这时她从卧室里探出头来说道：‘小子，才一美元?等着吧，等腿仙来了你能拿到差不多二十美元呢。’。”

'When I said that I'd never heard of this leg fairy, she explained that, when my kid legs fall off and my adult legs start to grow in, I'll have to just kind of hop around on my butt for a year or so, but I'll have the twenty bucks.

“我说我从来没听过什么腿仙，她便解释说，我只有等到儿童的腿脱落下来，才能长出成人的腿，在此之前我得用屁股跳来跳去跳上个一年半载，不过我能得到二十美元。”

'I cried inconsolably for hours.'

“我哭了好久，谁哄都哄不住。”

Travelling with kids can be tough, so it's little wonder lies are told as a way to make the journey more bearable.

带着孩子旅游挺受罪的，所以家长们撒点小谎也能让旅途轻松一点。

One person was told if they 'misbehaved in the car, the car would be sad'.

有网友的父母骗他/她说，“如果你们坐车时不听话，汽车是会伤心的”。

'Fast forward a year and I'm tearfully telling the car that I'm sorry he has to go, but I'm sure he'll be a cool plane in his next life.'

“很快，一年以后我泣不成声地向即将报废的汽车表示深深的遗憾和不舍，同时我也相信它下辈子一定会变成一辆酷炫的飞机。”

Another was told that if they did not behave on the plane, the pilot would turn around.

还有人被恐吓道，如果在飞机上不听话，飞行员就会把飞机掉头。

Others were more threatening.

还有一些更可怕。

'If I didn't sit still during a haircut, the barber would cut my ear off,' one person believed.

“如果理发时不坐端正，理发师就会把我的耳朵切下来，”有网友童年时对此深信不疑。

'The worst part was that the barber would play along.'

“最可怕的是理发师也会跟着附和!”

THE BIGGEST LIES TOLD TO KIDS

孩子们听过的弥天大谎

'If I touched something I wasn't supposed to... It would turn into a million spiders.'

“如果我碰了不该碰的东西……它就会变成一百万只蜘蛛。”

'When I was a child my dad told me that I used to have a tail. He said that he had to cut off because I kept turning into a giant monkey and started destroying everything during the full moon.'

“小时候我爸爸说我以前是有一条尾巴的。但是后来他不得不把那条尾巴切掉，因为在满月时我总是会变成一只大猴子，然后到处破坏东西。”

'My sister told me that if I burped with my mouth closed, no one would be able to hear it. I believed this until my mid-20s.'

“我姐姐说，只要打嗝时闭上嘴巴，别人就听不见我打嗝的声音了。二十多年后，我才发现被耍了。”